Bubbie Smuggling Ring Busted
May 23, 2012
RCMP border guards intercepted a smuggling ring that allegedly sneaks old Jewish women into Canada through elaborate ‘Rent-A-Bubbie’ schemes.
Canadian diplomats claim aging imposters from eastern Europe were placed in delegations of unhappy tourists, displaced families and seniors visiting Canada for medical research.
Once in Canada, the old phonies would file refugee claims to remain in the country.
The details, part of a series of secret government reports on “International Bubbie Fraud”, were obtained through our Funny And Jewish Access To Information request.
The report was prepared to help local police ahead of the Toronto 2013 Geriatric Games.
It said immigration officers have secretly profiled middle-aged men in airports who may be trying to sneak old women into the country posing as their grandmothers.
One of the accused is said to have obtained visas to travel abroad on 15 separate occasions, each time with a different ‘bubbie’ until he was finally arrested.
The report also said that fake divorces are quite common, attributing one such divorce to 53 alleged grandmas being sponsored in Canada.
To frame this problem into perspective, an immigration survey found that 97% of elderly Jewish female applications from the Slovakian region alone contained some sort of fraudulent claim.
Canadian officials are now considering mandatory cholent and chicken soup recipe tests, along with the standard English exams to further weed out those undesirable Jewish imposters.
