Guest post – Dr. Vegan Jones.
Funny Jewish Health Advice with Humour
Let’s begin the conversation by asking the obvious question: Why would anyone choose to become a vegan? I mean willingly, given the gift of free will.
Like most people, I try to eat a balanced diet culled from as many different food groups that my spare change permits.
Conversely, a well balanced ‘vegan diet’, herein referred to as the ‘plant and grub diet’, is limited by a much smaller range of available choices.
Most doctors support the healthy food choices made by vegans such as eating extra fruit, swallowing more vegetables and consuming vast quantities of whole grains.
Doctors also agree that a vegan’s diet is high in antioxidants and fibre, reducing the likelihood of diabetes, heart disease and some cancers. But so can quitting smoking, eating bran flakes and not locking yourself in a car while the engine is on, and the garage door closed.
So please tell me. Seriously…, why?
I ask because many years ago… I once knew a vegan.
This vegan (not a nameless person, but a grown man with a name who will simply be referred to as “the vegan”) was my next-door neighbor in a trendy part of town.
We were both accomplished musicians living above a sub joint and a dry cleaner. They didn’t bother us and we didn’t bother them. It was an ecosystem of mutual disregard.
We’d jam for hours all day and then snack afterwards well into the night, eating whatever we felt like, and lots of it. Life was great.
My friend subsequently developed a litany of stomach problems and his selection of allowable edibles became quickly limited. My friend soon realized that he had no option but to stare into the abyss of veganism.
He jumped in with full force, quickly adopting the life of an orthodox vegan.
It’s like a twist on the old saying: some people are born into veganism while others, like my friend, had veganism thrust upon him.
The take away from this is that all vegans can be relied upon to be a great source for other people’s humour. I know, I know, you’ve heard all the jokes before; but this next one is the best -
Question: What’s the difference between a plant and a vegan?
Answer: A plant consumes energy.
(Dr. Vegan Jones is neither a doctor nor a vegan, but offers advice freely on both).
End ‘O Part 1
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