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5 funniest Jewish Personals Ads

Funniest Jewish ClassifiedsRepeat Offender Wanted

A hearing impaired woman seeks a male echolaliac who is not afraid of expressing himself.

Is This Thing On?

Long-winded rabbi with a noticeable, small stutter seeks a very patient (make that extremely patient) congregation.

Why YOU Should Get To Know US

Funny & Jewish Girl of the Month: I’m the girl your mother warned you about… And so did your sister… And your sister’s best friend… As well as your buddies down at the coffee shop… And don’t forget that both my d#uche bag parents also hate your guts… Need any more references?

Funny & Jewish Guy of the Month: I have a mouth as dirty as a subway platform. Hold on! That’s not what I meant to say. I’ll start again. Money can’t buy love but then again, maybe it can. I’m so loaded;.. Wait: I did it again! Like a retired wet nurse, I have problems expressing myself. If you’re the same, sit yourself down and take a long, long time and write me a brief reply.

Do You Like Feet…A Lot?

Wanted: – You are an outgoing Levi with a foot fetish. We are an outreach minion of Cohane chiropodists who need our feet washed for the Priestly blessings. Are you in? No boys under 13, please.

Speed Dating for Seniors

FunnyAndJewish.com is now presenting Speed Dating for Seniors in your area. Meet up to 2 dates in 4 hours (including snack breaks, 3 naps & 7 washroom interruptions). If interested, please reply through our Funny And Jewish Contact section.

Funny And Jewish is a Satirical Humour Site.

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3 Responses “5 funniest Jewish Personals Ads”

  1. Mr. Nofollow
    April 9, 2013 at 11:55 pm

    Spot on with the Funny Jewish Personal Ads and worthy of a write-up. I truly believe this website requires a lot more consideration. I’ll likely be back again to read more, thanks.

  2. Gotta Ha Ha!
    April 14, 2015 at 11:50 pm

    I get it now!

    • Luv this stuff
      January 22, 2017 at 11:10 am

      For all of us shmendricks who were hooked on MAD since puberty, this website is a panacea and should, be’ezrat hashed, serve us well into our senior years. Kol Hakavod to Newton and the Usual Gang of Shlemiels and Shmendricks.

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